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Exclusive: Egan Foote Saves New York’s ‘Polskie Radio’

Unless alcohol consumption, lawsuits and foot-related puns evidence special powers, Egan Foote is no super hero. But thatimg28.jpg doesn’t mean that the listeners of New York’s “Polski Radio” don’t consider him one anyway:

New York’s “Polskie Radio” won’t be forced to go English. Despite a license renewal objection, “Polskie Radio New York” WRKL (910) doesn’t have to worry about adding English-language programming. Listener Robert Schore tried to kick the suburban station off the air, filing an objection with the FCC arguing “few listeners” in the area speak Polish. Schore argued WRKL should become an English station “devoted to the concerns of citizens in its primary coverage area.” Schore also alleges WRKL’s programming doesn’t discuss current issues or air emergency weather conditions. But his arguments weren’t enough for the FCC to deny the Polish station its license renewal. The Commission ruled WRKL “has served the public interest, convenience, and necessity” and didn’t violate any rules. The FCC also notes foreign-language stations must comply with the Emergency Alert System — but can do so in the primary language of their broadcast.

According to sources, Mr. Foote picketed the Federal Communications Commission day and night for several weeks, imploring the commissioners to leave Polskie Radio as is. Foote (pictured outside the office of FCC Chairman Kevin Martin during his campaign) became famous for his creative use of the bullhorn, often chanting “Hell no, 9-1-0” and “What do we want?” “Polski Radio!!” “When do we want it?” “At least as quickly as it took famous Pole scientist Janusz Grozkowski to discover a new method of high-vacuum measurements!”

Perhaps most amazing is that Foote’s plan worked. According to a source inside the FCC who wishes to remain anonymous discussing a sensitive matter tells Hot Foote that the FCC’s decision was “all Foote. Honestly, they didn’t really know which way to decide; they were actually thinking of flipping a coin. Until Egan came along. Chairman Martin was the first to speak up, proposing that perhaps if they just let Polskie Radio be then Mr. Foote would abandon his protest. The other members agreed and here we are.”

And where did Foote celebrate his recent achievement? On the Polskie Radio WRKL 910 morning zoo morning show, of course (translated below):

Jozef: Mr. Foote, we first want to thank you for your effort for Polskie Radio! (rings Eurasian Lynx bell).

Foote: You are quite welcome, Jozef. But thanks is not necessary. Did the nation of Poland ask thanks when they invented the screen door for submarines or the solar powered flashlight? I think not. Did Polish mathemetician Stanislaw Lojasiewicz ask thanks when he solved the problem of distribution division by analytical functions? No. And did Polish physicist Jan Kazimierz ask for thanks when he created the first spectrometer beta? Well, bad example, because he did and they threw him a big parade and stuff…

Jozef: Why Polskie radio?

Foote: Best programming on radio right now. Hands down. Hey, looks like your lights just went out…

Jozef: Oh man, another one! Wiktor, come help me screw in this light bulb. We’ll be back after a word from our sponsor, Nisskosher Polish Vodka…

Foote: Egan, out!

Developing…

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February 11, 2008 - Posted by | Uncategorized

2 Comments »

  1. Not a whole lot of sun over there in Poland, is there Egan?

    Comment by Rickey Henderson | February 13, 2008

  2. Egan has actually never been to Poland (don’t tell my friends at Polskie Radio) but has long been intrigued by the country…

    Egan, out(ed as someone who has never been to Poland)!

    Comment by foote | February 13, 2008


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