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Egan Foote Consoles Lousiana Governor and Childhood Friend Bobby Jindal After Disastrous Rebuttal Speech

Louisiana Governor and 2012 Presidential hopefuly Bobby Jindal delivered the Republicans’ rebuttal speech following Barack Obama’s pseudo-State of the Union address last night.  Fortunately for Mr. Jindal, his speech created a rare moment of bipartisanship in an otherwise perpetually gridlocked Washington; unfortunately for the governor and one-time exorcist, that rare moment of agreement was over how terrible Mr. Jindal’s speech actually was.

Distraught over his poor performance, Jindal sought solace from his oldest friend, insurance processor Egan Foote.

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Developing…


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February 25, 2009 Posted by | Uncategorized | Leave a comment

Flashback: February 8, 1991 – Egan Foote Fooled by Nintendo Gameboy, Threatens Nintendo Customer Service Representative

Skip to about 1:45 in, or click here

February 9, 2009 Posted by | Uncategorized | 1 Comment

Developing: Egan Foote’s Brother, Eggbert Foote, Arrested for Illegal Animal Testing

Eggbert Foote, the estranged brother of insurance processor Egan Foote, and the former long-term resident of a Russian holding cell, was arrested on Super Bowl Sunday for conducting experiments on a number of household cats. The FBI was initially tipped off when a number of pet cats went missing in the small Rhode Island neighborhood where Foote owns a house. After a picture of Eggbert Foote that seemingly shows Foote conducting experiments on a housecat (see below) was received by the FBI from an anonymous source, the FBI investigated further and agents were quick to arrest the elder of the Foote brothers.

billingsleyanimal

Developing…

john-billingsley-2Update: Egan Foote was approached while exiting an adult video store in Sandusky, Ohio and asked about the allegations surrounding his big brother.  While initially refusing comment, Foote eventually said: “As Cat Fancy Magazine’s 2007 Cat Owner of the Year, I am obviously very troubled by the allegations against my brother.  Eggbert explicitly told me that he would only be experimenting on dogs, not cats!… uh… forget I… uh… said that (wipes sweat from forehead)… Egan, out!!”

February 2, 2009 Posted by | Uncategorized | Leave a comment